Hemmer's Newbie Guide

Last Updated: Thursday, 09-Jan-2003 01:54:14 EST

Hey folks,

What you're about to read is what I think is a great all purpose get started on the phish-dot-net manual for first time readers, and newbie tape collectors alike. ( Specifically directed towards tape collectors, however, applicable in ways to all new users!)

First of all, if you're reading this, you probably have found your way to the "Phish Net". Thats good, because that's step one. Lets move on...

o you wanna jump right in and get tapes, but wait, thats not a good idea. First thing that you need to do, if you haven't already, is go to the Phish archive and get the FAQ. This will obviously answer your frequently asked questions about the .net and PHiSH in general. Once you get it, read it and learn it. (It's actually really interesting) Next....

First of all, if you are not familiar with USENET and the idea of newsgroups, you should look for one of many books available in most bookstores on the internet which contain information about all internet related material (including USENET) In-depth descriptions of USENET and how to "get hooked up to it" are beyond the scope of this manual. If you are familiar with newsgroups and how to get "hooked up to it" then read on!

Start reading the newsgroup rec.music.phish. Read it not for a day, not for two days, try something more like 2 weeks or 3 weeks. Just read all the articles. Don't write anything yet. Learn from the articles just what goes on around the net. Keep an eye out for subject lines with the words "NEWBIE OFFER" in them. While you're reading all the articles, read even closer all messages with newbie offers. This is where you are going to get your first tapes from. You see a newbie offer, respond to it, you see another, respond to that one too! Sure, you're going to have to go buy some blank tapes and postage, but hey, it's worth it. Also, *do not* reply to offers where the person doing the offer is asking for extra blanks or compensation in return. There are plenty of people willing to spin tapes for no form of compensation. And hey, while I'm talking about buying tapes, don't go to your local Records -R- Us, (unless they are on sale :-) get them mail order:

Terrapin Tapes
1-800-677-8650 (order 50 or more, get free shipping!)
  - or -
Hunts Wholesale 
1-800-278-TAPE
  - or - 
Both of these vendors offer tapes at very competitive prices.

Anyways, the time should come (about a month, shouldn't be much less) after you started reading the net where you have a pretty good grasp of all that happens. By now you should also have around 10 good phish tapes to your name (mayebe more!). Remember, at this point, you haven't written anything flame-worthy on the net, so except for the people who did the newbie offers, nobody on the net has seen/heard of you. But, although they havn't heard of you yet, you have some cool tapes as well as a good understanding of how the net works. This is also a good time to start building a tape list. I've found that the best way to save a tape list is simply as a TEXT file with lines no more than 80 characters long. This tends to make it much easier to e-mail your list to somebody. (As opposed to using a graphical word processing program with fonts/sized etc. and saving in something other than ASCII text. )Some people are satisfied with a list like the following format:

**My Phish List*
2.6.89 - The Front, Burlington I,II
4.4.90 - J.J.McCabes, Boulder I,II
blah blah blah

which is perfectly fine, I however like going a bit farther, like:

                                                                Grade  
Date      Location                   Sets   Length   Gen   Src  I  II
--------  ------------------------   ----   ------   ---   ---  -----
10.20.89  The Front, Burlington VT   I,II   180      2     SBD  A+ A+

etc. etc. etc.

You can and should set up your list however you want to. It's *all* personal preference.

Finally, you're ready to start writing to the net. Write anything you want, you won't say anything to piss anybody off because you know "how" to write to the net. (Again, all the details of "netiquette" are beyond this manual.) The cool thing about this is, you can write something like the following:

"Hey everybody, does anybody want to trade some high quality phish tapes with me? Let me know"

Somebody sees that, they want to trade, they get in touch with you, and you trade lists. Simple as that. Your list is small, but who cares? If they're interested, they'll let you know. What happens now? Well, since you asked, you're now trading tapes with netters, and posting messages and NOT ONCE did you post something like this:

"Hi phish phans! I'm really new to this phish thing, and am looking phor anybody who can help me get some phish tapes. If you have any and want to give them to me, or know where I can buy some, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE help me. I will love you phorever!! Also, I just bought a Phish CD called "All The Way from Gamehenge", the guy said it was live and gave me a deal, only 45 bux. Wow, anyways... Please e-mail me privatly if you can help!"

That would be called GROVEL, (amoung other things) but you *never posted anything like that* You know better! You are now a participating member of the Phish net and your tape collection is growing. Doesn't that feel good?

If you just went to your first Phish show last night (or even your 2nd or 3rd, doesn't matter) Please don't post something like this:

"Wow! That was an awesome show! Could somebody please give me a copy of the tape! I have lots of Phish tapes to trade for it......."

It's O.K to say it was a cool show. But, don't ask for the tape of it the next day, because you most likely will not get a response. You have to remember that alot of the tapers are actually touring with the band. This means that they are not really ready to start spinning copies of it for everybody, so give it time. Wait until you see that somebody is starting a tree (see the FAQ for information about tape trees), write to that person and tell him/her you're interested. It takes patience and time, just sit back and relax.

One more thing. It is very important to remember that trading tapes is not even a fraction of the good of the net! The Phish net has so very much more to offer than a means of getting tapes. It is a place for discussion, questions, complaints, general chatting, or whatever about Phish and Phish related material. Sure, it is a breeding ground for tape trading, and that is a good thing, but, we can't forgot that the net's uses extend FAR beyond just trading tapes. It is important for everyone to realize this.

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